Behold...

A graph that compares the daily fluctuations in British populous, with Niki's daily work schedule. 'Tis no coincidence dear readers, that as Niki be more busy, the population be more sparse...


Having gazed in awe at The Disambiguous Chart Of Plenty, please peruse The Essential Table Of Analysis thereunder, without which Niki's graph would be utterly meaningless (which of course, it most certainly isn't).

February

DPDs in Brighton

"Nikis" expended

Niki's "Highlights"
Thu 1st 20 100

Niki worked very hard on this day, expending exactly 100% of herself. She had to be carried home.
Fri 2nd 8 40  
Mon 5th 22 62

Anomaly - Although the population decreased today, Niki's workload did NOT increase, due to time spent emailing her friends. This resulted in a pile of paperwork for 10 "Unprocessed Fatality Overheads" (UFOs). In order to hide this from her boss, Niki cleverly made this paperwork "vanish", expending just 2 extra "Nikis". This process of Niki-Saving would be handy in the future.
Tue 6th 11 55  
Wed 7th 15 75

Having smoked a big cone at lunchtime, the confused Niki accidentally deletes 3 years worth of Death Certificates from the Sussex County database. Whoops!
Thu 8th 3 15

Anomaly - With few deaths today, the conscientious cutie seizes her chance to restore all lost information to the Database of Recent Death Record Entries (Dr. Dre), at a cost of very many "Nikis".
Fri 9th 12 60

An unmotivated Niki was today overheard grumbling "where are all these STIFFS coming from?!?!"
Mon 12th 8 40

Tue 13th 7 45

Anomaly - Ten foolishly squandered "Nikis" when the befuddled beauty endearingly processes a recently deceased Master of Disguise 3 times…
Wed 14th 18 90  
Thu 15th 5 25

Niki EXTREMELY annoyed after being told that her highlights were "unflattering".
Fri 16th 13 65  
Mon 19th 10 55

Anomaly - Five blatantly wasted "Nikis" when, after being in the meat locker for ten days, Granny Glossop came back to life.
Tue 20th 18 10

Niki got told off today: " People don't stop dying just because YOU can't be bothered to do any work, Missy... Buck your ideas up or you're OUT!"
Wed 21st 0 0

Death called in sick today after becoming entangled in his robes, and falling down three flights of stairs. He didn't die though, so no irony to be found here.
Thu 22nd 14 70

Lovely Niki feels a sense of job satisfaction when Granny Glossop calls her personally to apologise for any inconvenience she may have caused…
Fri 23rd 12 60

Little Niki upset when Old Mr Rabbit The Caretaker passes away, having worked at the hospital for 95 years.
Mon 26th 17 20

After a heavy weekend, there were less "Nikis" to go around…
Tue 27th 14 70  
Wed 28th 16 80

The month ends on a real high for our heroine, as Mr & Mrs Rabbit present her with flowers to thank her for dealing with their father so professionally...

Here endeth The Golden Spreadsheet Of Knowledge...


Click HERE for a completely unrelated easter card that's all about eggs!